Dreams would be much more fun if they were multi-player servers that other sleeping people could join.
"can i come in?"
"i don’t know, can you?”
cursing quietly, the vampire backed away, foiled yet again by the english teacher’s pedantry
yeah so i slept with this dude last night and idk we were chatting a bit during the sexy time and for some reason his birthday came up and i was like “wait 25th of september? DUDE me TOO, wtf thats such a coincidence” and he was like “really? we have the same birthday? are u fuckin with me?” and i just looked down at his penis literally inside my vagina and was like “well technically yeah” and he was like haha nice one and high fived me
Ame Lee of Evanescence
Nothing makes you look more suspicious than randomly laughing while doing science, because you know who else randomly laughs while doing science? Supervillians.
my friend John just wrote the best post about catcalling possibly ever.